For those of you who know Isaac and may have the same concerns... read on!
I have been concerned about Isaac recently b/c he's so mean. Seriously. He loves to be "bad" and often attacks others (while pretending to be bad) with a mean look on his face. I wrote a family therapist about our issue and here is what she said to set my mind at ease:
Regarding sweet Isaac, he does not sound the least bit crazy but every bit normal, especially as a second-born son. I think its very normal to identify with "bad guys" for three reasons. 1) Bad guys are big, strong and get people's attention. 2) Little ones don't realize the actual repercussions of the actions of bad guys (ie. death isn't permanent) and even mean or bad guys can be seen, sometimes, as being comical. At the very least, kids don't see them as being evil the way that we understand they would be.3) Kids often choose to identify with someone who is different from the other child in the house. Sometimes this comes as a result of the older child assigning the younger kid the role they don't want (ie. big kid wants to be the hero/good guy and the little one gets stuck with the less desirable role), other times the child selects it for themself because it sets them apart from the others.
I would encourage you to not be alarmed by his obsession, these things change as they get older and certainly doesn't mean he is on the path to rebellion and unrepentance. You may want to limit the tv/movies, but its likely that he'll be drawn to being the antagonist regardless of what he's seeing. I would recommend a few things. 1) Remind him of the difference between playing the bad guy and being a good kid. The line between reality and fantasy is still pretty fuzzy at this age. 2) Tell stories (or find some) about sharks, snakes, monsters, etc that show kindness & goodness so he can see that even strong, possibly scary characters, can have good qualities. I don't know if he's old enough to watch Monsters Inc, but that's a good example of a couple of monsters being kind & good. You can also remind him that Elmo, Cookie Monster, etc are monsters who are good. 3) Talk to him about how he likes to be a bad guy because its fun to be big, strong, and to get people to respond (usually out of fear) but that he can do those things without trying to hurt anyone. Then give examples of how you see him doing that, or how Daddy does that in a way that is pleasing to God and Mommy & Daddy. Fighting for righteousness is great, but probably kind of a fuzzy concept as well.
Any opinions on this?
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